A Mother's Day Series: Part 3
Today, I have the great privilege of introducing one of my dearest friends to you. I must admit, when I asked Marney if she would be willing to write a piece for my blog, I was truly hoping that she would say yes. You know those people that just have an incredible way with words? Marney is deep and genuine to the core, and that is reflected in her writing. She has been an encouraging voice in my life and a true friend. Her words are solid and weighty and will cheer you on, I guarantee it.
By: Marney Elzen-Hoskyn
I am mothering two bright and beautiful little boys; one 4 years and the other 8 months old. They are our (my husband’s and my) unabashed pride and joy, the very delight of our existence. We eat their bellies, nibble their necks, sniff their heads, kiss their cheeks, tickle their toes and hold their hands every chance we get. It’s still not enough. We talk about them when they are awake and miss them when they are asleep. We wipe their noses, bums and tears. We laugh and cry and cry and laugh. We worry, we plan, we make it up on the fly, we forgive ourselves and we high five. We get annoyed. We get tired. Mercy, do we get tired.
18 months ago my husband was brought to the brink of death and back again. We have always loved each other with deep gratitude but the journey through this valley changed us. Welcoming our littlest one was extraordinary and our hearts swell to bursting with each passing day. We know these are treasured times.
As a mother I have developed keen senses. I live with eyes wide open to the wonder of little fingers learning new tasks, ears quick to hear of a fresh discovery or new word and hands ready to reach out and steady unsure steps. I won’t describe what I have smelled but it’s a mothering milestone to lift a diaper bum to your nose and conduct an investigative sniff.
My heart has grown big and full and tender to a fault. The deep well of love, the sacred awareness of the gift these children are can render me a teary mystic in an instant.
So I attempt to perch on the precipice of the present where this trinity of motherhood unite: being awake to the moments of my children’s lives, mindful of the daily do-over tasks that build a home and grateful for the abundant blessing it is to nurture and love our boys.
In all bustle of life, I often call my mom. She always picks up the phone. In fact, she’s always there (often literally as she lives only 7 minutes down the road). This foundation of always there-ness helps to hold my feet steady in a world that pulls mothers in a million different directions. When I feel inadequate, insecure, guilty, unfit, incapable, uncertain, and like I’m earning a failing grade I look at the firm ground beneath me and I straighten up. I am here and so far as it is within my ability, I will always be here for my sons. It is easy to love well since I have been well loved.
My hope and prayer as a mother is that my intentional presence will lay a foundation for my children so they can be the kindness, gratitude and love our world so desperately needs. My reality is that they have made me and remade me a million times over and I am without words to describe the joy, love and thanks that fill me as I think of them asleep in their beds. May both always be true.